I don't care anymore! Whatever!

July 17, 2010

That is not really true I do care but I pick my battles more wisely. When I feel powerless to change certain circumstances I remove myself from the equation. Here are some examples.


My daughter insists on eating a ton of sugar and crap that she knows is not good for her. Then; like every teenage girl her age, she complains about her weight. When she was younger I sounded like a broken record. ‘You don’t need two desserts off the buffet bar’. ‘You don’t need to eat a whole pizza by yourself.’ 'No you cannot have a 15 oz. steak!'

It got to the point I was not enjoying my own meal because I was confronting her about the amount or type of food she was eating. Today when she cooks three hotdogs and looks at me I simply tell her ‘You took nutrition class at school and you know how to eat healthy so I am not going to nag you anymore.’

My son is 17. He developed a nasty habit of dipping tobacco.

I am a dentist! He works as an assistant in my office!

I was enraged at first. I warned him about all the dangers of oral cancer but he didn’t listen. I have confiscated cans of tobacco, threatened the friends who buy it for him and refused to defend him when he got suspended from school for dipping on campus.

Nothing works so I quit nagging. He may not get oral cancer; but he will probably get a mouth full of decayed teeth. He knows how I feel about it and my constant nagging is not helping him-or me. Funny thing is I casually told him the other day that his teeth are starting to turn yellow. He didn’t like that at all – perhaps this will be the stimulus to quit the dip. I am not mentioning it again. I have found the less I say the better.

The list still goes on. My kids need to do their homework and study for their tests. They listen to their iPods WAY to loud, they probably shouldn’t blow all their allowance the first day they get it, their rooms are filthy and their laundry has not been done for weeks.

I will not nag until I am affected.

The day their unlaundered clothes stink they need to resolve the issue or they will not ride in the car with me. I will not supplement their income at the end of the week because they did not spend wisely. I figure it is better for them to experience being overdrawn and broke under my roof instead of when they are on their own. They abide by their set bedtimes because I am not going to deal with sleepy cranky kids. They do not text at the dinner table because I want their undivided attention.

When I quit nagging they started to listen. This was an interesting turn of events...ah but I will save that interesting story for tomorrow.